Supporting victims of sexual offences in a religious context

Other experts who participated in the seminar program were Marek Drábek, a hospital chaplain, and Martina Vintrová, a church-wide lawyer, who help victims of sexual violence in their daily practice.

Before the seminar we had the opportunity to watch videos on the topic in the home environment.

The personal testimony of a victim of sexual violence was a powerful experience for us. We had the opportunity to sit face to face with a person who has had such an experience. There was ample space for our questions and we were given answers. I had never personally encountered a person who had been sexually abused in a church setting.

Talking about the perpetrator, it turns out that he was an intelligent person who knew how to gain the trust of young people, buying them gifts that their parents could not give them and taking them on outings. He himself may be emotionally immature, suffering from a personality disorder or sexual deviance. He may even have been sexually abused as a teenager. He sought out and helped victims who were vulnerable and had low self-esteem. He showed them he cared. Gradually entangling them in a spiral of gratitude and obedience. The children began to be grateful for his care, concern and love, which is typical for those of them who have a weak social background. As a result, later on, the abuse itself occurs.

When Mr. Jiří went public with his story, others with similar experiences began to contact him.

A powerful moment was when Mr. Jiří told us that he did not mean to hurt anyone, not even the priest. „I forgave him, I didn't want to carry it inside me.“ He also mentioned that his relationship with God was very important to him.

It was mentioned several times how important prevention is: talking about sexuality with children. Children should have trust in us. This is necessary so that they can come to us and confide their troubles. It is also important to notice changes in children's behaviour. The therapist should be there for the child, listen patiently and, above all, not convince the child that it was not the way it happened or that it was different.

Sometimes what happens is that people inside and outside the church don't want to talk about such difficulties, blaming the victims, wondering why they are bringing up the act after so many years, that it will hurt the congregation, their pastor, or the church. They speak of fear. After all, the Church is open to all, it is a meeting place before God. Jesus is an example for us, he himself welcomed all people without distinction, visited them, sat with them, touched the sick. This is the right way for us, even when there is something new, unknown, that we do not know how to deal with.

Irena Popová
Editorially abridged